on the bathroom floor

It makes me feel like a surgeon performing an operation especially with the really fine parts. And sometimes I get very nervous too [especially during VA lessons because those are GRADED]...Painting at home seems to be better though I don't really do it [though I just did today which is why I'm even writing about this], but I feel more at ease. I really must try to relax during lessons...I don't think getting nervous over this stuff is really genuine. It's like you're being forced and all this is barfed out. I don't know if the other VA people feel this way but I do sometimes. It's just that I'm really afraid of making mistakes and you know you can't rewind. And it's really frustrating sitting there thinking "50% chance of ruining a potential masterpiece..." And then you also feel bad about not taking risks. And why am I even telling you this?

Maybe it's just sinking in that we're gonna be back in school.